that life can change, that you’re not stuck in vain.

oh, i’m back.

i’m not the same, i’m different.

life is good.

blogging to commence momentarily.

she doesn’t own a dress; her hair is always a mess.

i’ve got my shit together and found myself in a completely different place than i was 3 weeks ago.  i’m figuring it out. it’s slow, but it’s sure.  finding a job at stanford, where i was going to school, has helped me dodge an early mid-life crisis or a heart attack leading to an early grave.  i get to remain close to the university and do research in the field that i love.  every day since september 10th has helped me realize that the decision was right.  it was hard, it hurt, and a lot of tears were shed, but i am confident it was the right decision.  the program wasn’t right for me and that is that.

as promised….here are some pretty pictures

it’s only words, and words are all i have

on wednesday i made a decision.  not just a, “hmm…should i have the chicken or the fish?” type of decision, but a significant life-altering decision. i am not going back to school.  as i type that, i can’t believe that i am writing those words.  i am not going back to school.  i am not going back to school.

two days ago if someone asked me to describe myself, one of the first things i would say would be “i’m a student. i’m getting my doctorate in psychology.”  i was so proud. i worked so hard.  but i cannot do it anymore.  now i am dealing with a major rupture in my self identity, who am i if i am not a student?  a dream of being a doctor dashed.  6 years of work down the drain.  confusion, frustration, distress, disappointment and emptiness.

what do i do now? who am i now? who will i be?

almost fell into that hole in your life.

my name is jill.  i’m not at all cool.  i recently moved to the bay area –  home of 99% of america’s liberals and that’s ok.  officially i am here to learn about psychology.  unofficially, i am here to learn about people. and culture. and, well, life in general.  but most of all, i am here to get another perspective.  i’m tired of the status quo.

i started, and abandoned, a blog not so recently.  i’m ready to embark on the blog world minus the eyes of people i know.  i promise entertainment, hilarious anecdotes, pretty pictures, and my fucked up perspective.    i hope you’ll join me in this journey.

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